Being in a relationship for several years and happily married is possible. The key is to respect a few basic rules within the relationship. Discover our 15 tips for being a happy couple. Happiness can be cultivated!
#1. Be good friends
Couples who work and last over time are often loving couples who are also the best friends in the world. The person you choose must of course thrill you emotionally and sexually, but they must also be someone you can count on at any time, to whom you can confide everything and with whom you can share everything. A person with whom you have no filter and who will never judge you.
#2. Establish foundations
For a romantic relationship to work, it is necessary to establish from the beginning a sort of “couple code” to which you will refer throughout the duration of your affair. In other words, take the time to have a discussion with your loved one to define the nature of your emerging relationship and the limits that it imposes: What do you both expect from this adventure? Do you want to be exclusive, or on the contrary do you allow yourself to look elsewhere? What about the notion of loyalty? etc.
>> Also read: 12 Signs of Green Flags in a Relationship: The Keys to a Healthy Bond
#3. Have common projects
Without going so far as to plan, from the first date, the date of your wedding or defining the number of children you will have, having common dreams and projects is very important in a relationship. Envisioning a more or less near future with your partner will tend to unite the couple and give them a reason to move forward. In particular, when the objectives set are substantially the same.
#4. Reserve special moments for two
Carried away by routine, we sometimes forget to spend quality time as a couple. Set aside at least one evening a week just for the two of you to go to the movies, to a restaurant, or simply to have dinner alone at home. Simple moments that will strengthen the bond!
#5. Being sexually fulfilled
There is no such thing as a happy, fulfilled couple who doesn’t or no longer makes love. Even if it doesn’t do everything or solve problems, sex is still an important part of the relationship. It should not be neglected. Making love is an intense moment of sharing that consolidates the relationship.
#6. Accept your partner as he is
Are you extremely manic and he is rather unorganized? So what? Within the couple, tolerance is essential. When you love someone, you love them for their qualities and their faults. If you want your relationship to work, you will have to accept and learn to live with your partner’s faults. And above all, don’t try to change it at all costs, you won’t get anything good out of it.
>> Transforming Communication in Relationships: Expert Tips to Enhance Connection
#7. To love yourself
Before you love someone, you must first learn to love yourself. If you are not in tune with yourself or you do not accept yourself as you are, you will probably not let your partner give you the love you deserve and you will never be truly fulfilled.
#8. Take time for yourself and preserve your secret garden
Being in a relationship does not mean no longer having intimacy. Quite the contrary! Of course, a couple needs to share moments together, but that doesn’t mean spending most of their time with the other. For a more fulfilled and healthy relationship, both parties must be able to enjoy a great deal of autonomy when they want. Furthermore, without going so far as to lie or hide facts specific to their common relationship, it is important that each of the two entities maintains their secret garden and does not feel obliged to reveal the smallest details of their current or past life.
#9. Know how to communicate
Communication is the glue of the couple. Without it, the relationship is doomed to failure. If something bothers you, talk to your partner directly and calmly. By keeping it to yourself, you risk accumulating resentments and bringing them up at an inopportune time.
And if your partner feels the need to talk to you, listen to what they have to say and don’t interrupt them. Even if it means taking blame. Only by respecting and listening to each other will you be able to communicate to get out of a delicate situation.
#10. Have confidence in others
It’s difficult to build a relationship without trust. However, granting the latter to your loved one is sometimes easier said than done. Particularly when it has previously been violated. However, even if during your past experiences you have already been betrayed, you must give your current spouse a chance to be worthy of said trust because it is essential in a couple.
#11. Maintain the relationship
In love as in friendship, unmaintained relationships tend to fade… It is not because you have been together for more than five years that you should no longer be seductive and take your partner for granted. A happy couple is one who does not suffer the weight of the years and above all who does not get stuck in a routine!
#12. Compromise
Being in a relationship also means knowing how to make compromises and concessions. Do you want to spend Christmas with your loved ones but their parents are planning to go to Paris during this period? Rather than tearing each other apart, find common ground! Spend New Year’s Eve on the 24th with your in-laws and celebrate the New Year together, at your parents’ house.
#13. Accept the different
The difference between a happy couple and one that is not is their ability to overcome and take advantage of a conflict situation. Arguments within a couple are inevitable. However, rather than getting bogged down in an argument, it is sometimes better to let go and accept that certain conflicts cannot find common ground. Only at this price will you be able to be happy.
#14. Play the honesty card
Do you think he’s too nice to his friends but don’t dare tell him so as not to upset him? Last week, you lost your job but continue to leave in the morning for fear of telling him? Even though it is important to have your secret garden, you must be transparent with your partner. At least, if you value your relationship. Lying or hiding things in order to preserve or not cause pain has never been beneficial for anyone.
#15. Do not let a balance of power take hold
This is one of (if not THE) most important rules! There should never be inequality within your relationship. Both parties must have the same weight in joint decisions (children, house, purchases, etc.) and neither must feel belittled.
